Lately I’ve been faced with some challenging and troubling situations that have left me feeling angry, disappointed, sad, and generally not great. A cranky student, false accusations, financial issues, a sick friend, and other “stuff” have landed me in the muck of an imperfect world. At first, I was kicking myself for feeling less than positive. But I couldn’t shake the crud no matter how hard I tried to embrace the power of positive thinking.

After several weeks, and more “stuff” cropping up, I started to realize that sometimes “stuff” is bad, and it’s okay to feel the badness of it. I know that’s not great grammar, but I hope you get my meaning. No amount of denial will wish away the circumstances and garbage I have to deal with and I can’t really pretend it’s pretty when it’s not.

I’m not suggesting a life of perpetual negativity, but I think there are positive benefits to acknowledging the garbage for what it is and feeling it’s effects. Sometimes life just stinks, and no amount of air freshener will cover it up or make it better. I can hang onto hope, pursue peace, and think positive, but these things won’t change the fact that sometimes the messes of life make me feel bad.

The real lesson came as I realized that it’s okay to feel bad when things are bad. I don’t have to embrace the bad or wallow in it, but I can’t wish it away either. By identifying the “stuff” and owning my feelings about it, I can allow myself space to be sad. Then I can keep going, sadness and all. Thankfully life doesn’t stop just because I’m sad, or mad, or slept wrong. Sometimes the best way to get through a bad day is to wake up tomorrow and start again.

The challenges I encounter usually can’t be resolved in a five minute pep talk or prayer. Usually, they are resolved as I walk out each step one by one, day after day until the “stuff” is fixed or forgotten – and quickly replaced by new “stuff.” I’m sad that a student is angry with me. I’m mad that someone said things about me that are untrue. I’m disappointed that a person owes me money and refuses to pay it back. I’m concerned about my sick friend. These things don’t give me warm fuzzies. And I’m learning they don’t need to because it is okay to feel bad about stuff that is bad.

Each day I get up and start again. Each day I walk through whatever I need to do to keep going, to seek resolution, to do what’s right, and to follow God. I don’t pretend that rotten tomatoes smell like roses. They don’t. But just because I feel bad doesn’t mean I stop waking up and walking through it.